The winds brought sand in my eyes,
I can no longer see
The waves that come rushing,
Leaving me blind in the sea.
I tried to understand the details
Of why you kept away.
So I Could try to win you back,
Before it was too late.
Our ships have struggled in the winds of the storm.
They've put up with a lot of problems already.
We can't afford to crash into a rock,
Now that we've set off for the journey into sea.
I wish you would understand
How it'd feel to be in the dark for too long.
I wish you could at least try
To realize that your promise was a lie.
Try going away another time,
But tell me before,
So I wont try stop you.
This truth has finally come down to me,
Come down to me with force.
Don't you blame the wind
If our ships have changed their course.
6 comments:
"I tried to understand the details
Of why you kept away.
So I Could try to win you back,
Before it was too late."
Good stanza! ^^
But overall, I hate the poem. The ending sucks. Really. xD
^^ yay !
thank you!
FR; don't know if that was irony on your part, hope it was. You may ofc think what you want of this poem, but I believed the ending to be the best part of it. What really made the poem.
Also this part:
"I wish you would understand
How it'd feel to be in the dark for too long.
I wish you could at least try
To realize that your promise was a lie."
Simple but really effective, and DP once again proves to me what he writes hits like a brick in the stomach.
Way to go DP, I have full faith in you.
haha, becc, I couldnt stop laughing and smiling at the same time.
Well, I dont blame Rose for not liking the poem, it was mostly cos of the reasons behind why i wrote the poem, and not the poem itself.. :P
And I'm more than happy to know you have faith in me. :) Better hope I live up to it !! xD
Beautiful!
"I tried to understand the details
Of why you kept away.
So I Could try to win you back,
Before it was too late."
oh my god, I keep finding good poets after good poets! (and I feel smaller ^^)
thanks for the comments roccari! Means a lot to me!
and NO WAY should you consider yourself to be small or anything, cos you are anything but that!
You're Amazing! xD
Post a Comment